Structuring the Feedback

  • I've noticed [specific behaviour] — I wanted to share some feedback.
    Opening with a specific observation, not a judgement
    "I've noticed that your pull requests sometimes lack context in the description — I wanted to share some feedback."
  • The impact of [behaviour] is [specific consequence].
    Connecting behaviour to impact
    "The impact of incomplete PR descriptions is that reviewers spend extra time understanding the context — it slows the review cycle."
  • What I'd find helpful going forward is [specific ask].
    Making the change request concrete and forward-looking
    "What I'd find helpful going forward is a 3-sentence summary of what the PR does and why in every description."
  • I want to flag this now because I think it's fixable and I'd like to see you succeed.
    Framing the feedback as supportive, not punitive
    "I'm flagging this now because I think it's absolutely fixable and I want to see you succeed in this team."

Delivering Difficult Messages

  • I'm going to be direct — I hope that's OK.
    Priming for honest feedback without being harsh
    "I'm going to be direct — I hope that's OK. The quality of your commits has slipped over the last two sprints."
  • This isn't about [one incident] — it's a pattern I've observed over [time period].
    Framing feedback as systemic, not reactive
    "This isn't about last Tuesday's bug — it's a pattern I've observed over the past month."
  • I'd like to hear your perspective on this — what's been going on?
    Inviting dialogue after delivering feedback
    "I'd like to hear your perspective — is there something I'm missing about the context?"

Phrases to Avoid

These common phrasings undermine your professionalism. Here are better alternatives.

Avoid "You always do this."
Better "In the last three sprints, I've noticed [specific pattern]."

"Always" is an absolute that triggers defensiveness. Specific, time-bounded observations are harder to dispute.

Avoid "You need to be more professional."
Better "In the stand-up yesterday, interrupting twice made it harder for others to share updates."

"Be more professional" is vague. Naming the specific behaviour and its impact is actionable.

Avoid "I'm not the only one who thinks this."
Better "I'm sharing my own observation — I can only speak to what I've seen directly."

Invoking anonymous others weakens your credibility and feels like an ambush. Own your feedback.

Practice Exercises

Choose the most professional or correct phrase for each scenario.

Frequently Asked Questions

What is the SBI feedback model?

SBI stands for Situation–Behaviour–Impact. It structures feedback as: the Situation (when/where it happened), the Behaviour (what you observed), and the Impact (the consequence). It keeps feedback factual and specific.

What does "actionable feedback" mean?

Actionable feedback gives the recipient a clear, specific change they can make. "Be more communicative" is not actionable; "Send a daily status update in Slack by 10am" is.

What is "psychological safety"?

Psychological safety is the shared belief that it's safe to speak up, take risks, and give honest feedback without fear of punishment. It's a foundation of high-performing engineering teams.